Archive | May, 2012

Biology – Makes sense, but then I Marvel.

29 May

It doesn’t strike me funny as I pass an air freshener, get a whiff of deodorant, or walk behind a trail of perfume or cologne and want to gag. Lack of desiring scents makes sense in pregnancy.

It is our sense of smell that gets us in to relationships (and eventually marriage where you make a baby) in the first place. When I was in college, one of my fellow bio major roommates shared an intriguing research study done with smells (specifically body odor) and attraction. Women were asked to wear the same t-shirt for a number of days without bathing. Then, guys came in later and smelled the shirts and ranked them. Interestingly enough, the guys picked the t-shirts of women who had the most different immune system from their own.  This is a perfect and beautiful example of biology. In order for our young to survive, we seek out traits that are different from our own. It is genetic diversity and contributes to survival of the fittest. This type of mate selection is totally normal and natural, and most people will never even realize the real reason behind why they chose a mate. So, biology makes sense!

If we continued desiring and pursuing smelly people and continued with reproductive (mating) behavior WHILE pregnant, the young’s father would get angry (rightly so) and either abandon or eat the young (okay, maybe not the latter).  So, there is nature, preserving our future generations.  Thank you, biology.

Here is where I marvel: morning sickness (and what idiot named it morning sickness, when it is really all-day-long sickness?). While it totally makes sense to be repelled by scent, I turn green when I pass by greens (and every other colored food). It just doesn’t make sense. I am growing a baby. My body needs to provide good nutrition to the growing fetus. What it we didn’t live in a time of prenatal vitamins?  I will give a gold star to whomever can biologically crack this case (or maybe just a hearty “thank you”).

 

Here is one study I found similar to the one described above.

Just an average drive through town

18 May

Sitting at a stoplight enjoying the beautiful weather with my windows down.

Behind me is a rumbling motorcycle.

Im staring at the heavenly beems bursting forth behind,

and motorcycle dude hocks a luggie.

That was pretty badbooty (bada**).

I wonder…

if stick my head out the window

and throw up,

would I look equally badbooty?

Yuck!

When in doubt, pee!

9 May

I once wrote a facebook post that said, “Tee Gee Aye Eff!” and had many people confused if this was nonsense language, Spanish, or code for something (I will leave it to your brain to decode that one).  So, maybe my title is an abbreviation for something silly… Like, when in doubt, peeeee (as in park)!

But, it is not.  Nope, as a pregnant lady, it just stands for good ‘ole peeing.  Using the lavatory – the ladies room – urinating – relieving yourself.  Enough potty talk, let’s get back to…peeing.

When you want to know if you are pregnant, you pee on a stick.  When you go to the doctor’s office to make sure you don’t have any urinary tract infections during pregnancy, you pee in a cup.  Your uterus is pressing on your bladder, so you find yourself peeing in the middle of the night.  Your body needs more hydration and you drink more water, so you’re peeing every 5 minutes.  You get to know every bathroom on an intimate basis when you are pregnant.  Lastly, when you want to know your baby’s gender you… you guessed it… pee some more!

Now if you are freaking out because you missed the pee-on-a-stick gender test, don’t worry.  As far as I know, that does not exist.  However, there is a fancy early gender predictor kit available at pharmacies that will tell you with 85% accuracy if you are having a boy or a girl, all for the low price of $35-$50!  Too bad I am a penny pincher and will never buy that.  I mean, what woman can’t wait an extra 8 weeks or so to just find out the gender at an ultrasound?!  Or better yet, go purchase an early ultrasound for $75 at 13 weeks?

Sadly, my friends, that impatient woman is ME.  I cannot wait.  Even waiting until 13 weeks is killer (that is only 2 weeks away right now).  Why wait when you can do something a day earlier?  Ask a 40 week pregnant woman if she prefers to go in to labor NOW or tomorrow.  In 99% of circumstances, I would bet on the now.

But, let’s go back to the fact that I am cheap.  Hmm.  It is quite a conundrum.  Impatient PREGNANT lady wants to have a fun, educated, scientific guess on gender.  Impatient pregnant lady does not want to spend money.  What is an impatient pregnant lady to do?!  The answer:  gather her pee.

That’s right folks, there is another scientific way to do an early gender predictor test for the low low price of: FREE!  Yes, free!  And I will even throw in another early gender predictor test for a measly, additional price of: FREE!  Yes, yes, two early gender predictor tests for the low price of free.  Just pay for supplies!

Continue reading in a later post for instructions on the amazing tests and their surprising results!

Stay tuned 🙂